There is a little known legend about cell phones.
It is written that when the first wireless phones were designed, they were made to resemble men in their attitude and logical sense. That's why there are mostly men in the wireless phone stores. They don't really like to hire women to do this job because it sometimes angers the wireless god, he who we call PowGod.
PowGod has a bad temper and will only allow women to talk and text on certain frequencies. Those are frequencies that cut out in underground garages and certain major shoe stores.
However, it's also a little known fact that PowGod loves email! Yes! And do you know why? Because of the sound of the word 'mail.' Uh-huh. That's right.
He's quite the Greek God when it comes to his reflection, especially if it's him talking on the phone. The poses. The dapper stares. Quite the godlike figure.
The name 'PowGod' is actually from the ancient Greek word Powodopolus, meaning 'talking god who occasionally attaches ribbons to his ears and sings sweet lullabies while dancing on water.'
In the early '90s, it was rumored that PowGod wanted to take over the ribbon industry and create ribbons that lit up in different colors, depending on the mood of the wearer. However, P and his staff of creators (they are, after all, gods) could not agree on which colors to use for good dreams, since they range from 'Good' to 'Wow!' with an occasional 'Zowie!" Some wanted purple, some red, others wanted fireworks. Considering that most gods (and people) dream while sleeping, and in a prone position, they figured fireworks might get a little messy, just a little hazardous, and dropped the idea.
Another major cell phone company decided to challenge PowGod and came out with a female version of the wireless phone that they quickly named LG. LG actually stands for LolaGod, 'she who washes her hair in lavender and wears prettier ribbons than PowGod, or even his close friend GoodGood.'
It's a crazy legend ... but there you have it.
