Cosmos and Love 

It’s Friday night.  I don’t have to study tonight (gone back to school online) and on the way home from work I decided that I wanted to have a couple of really strong Cosmos.  I make good ones, if you like them strong, and since I like them that way, well, I’m the best!

I’ve become addicted to a new song lately, from Gotye, “Somebody I Used to Know.”  The first time I heard it I got in half way, just when Kimbra was singing “Now and then I think of all the times you screwed me over…” and thought to myself (or maybe said out loud), “Oh, quit complaining!”  But now, I’ve heard it from the beginning and it’s a very catchy tune… really great lyrics if you listen from the beginning… and I’m addicted to this song.  No kidding.  It’s all about young love and how you fall in love with someone but know it’s not good for you, because you feel lonely in it.  When we are young (or ‘were’ in some cases) nobody ever mentioned that you might actually fall in love with someone and feel really lonely in the relationship.  It just comes as such a shock when you realize that’s where you are.  So lonely!

Cosmos are good.

And then something finally ends the relationship, and you have to deal with all the breaking up and hurt feelings and mending of self-images.  And the stuff!  You have to give back or get back all the stuff!  That’s not easy.  And every time you look at the stuff, it has memories attached to it.  “I remember when he had dinner on this plate” or “this was a crazy-fun time when we took this picture.”  When the things are in your hands, it’s almost as if they vibrate with memories.  You can feel them tingling your fingertips and moving up your arms and then right into your heart, to squeeze it, to hold it for just a few seconds and then let it go.  And then let it go.  Life is a lot of getting and letting go. 

Cosmos are fun.

Every now and then I think to myself (or maybe say out loud), “Sometimes I need a boyfriend.”  But the truth is that I need a boyfriend, sometimes.  Not all the time.  Just some times.  A few times a month would be perfect for a face-to-face boyfriend.  The rest of the month is good for emails.  Chats online.  Texting.  Meebo.  Instant Messenger (aka: IM).  Communicating with each other but just not in person, so you can be whatever or whomever you want or the other person wants, without all the garbage.  Without all the looks of anything other than pure, unconditional Love.  This is the kind of relationship I would like right now.  Let’s fantasize.  Let’s pretend.  Lets. 

Cosmos are our friends.

If I had a man who I could chat with a few times a day and we could talk about things, and then say loving things and, yes, sexy things, I would be happy.  We could meet a few times a month and have dinner, talk about stuff and things, current events or whatever, and then get physical for a while.  Lovingly physical.  He could spend the night.  We could get up the next morning, go out for a nice breakfast, talk a little, hold hands maybe, and say loving or friendly things to each other.  Then hug and kiss each other and say “see you later,” and life would be good.  We actually would see each other later.  Maybe online, maybe just email… maybe in video chat, texting, or Skype.  No games.  No hurt feelings.  Just friends that really like each other and, occasionally, in person. 

Wow, who made these Cosmos?

Vodka.  Cointreau.  Cranberry juice.  Lime juice.  Ice cubes.  Shake and pour.  Very nice.  I did it!  What a good girl am I.

Men are like… many things.  It depends on the man and the situation.  No, not the “Situation,” but real live men.  Men are like boats.  Like candy.  Like good wine.  Like bad cheese.  They come in all shapes and sizes, all colors, all sounds… and yet, they are basically … just men.  You got your good boat, your bad candy, your sour wine, and your pungent cheese (these are the stinky feet!).  It’s all good and bad depending on who raised them, how they relate to themselves and the opposite sex (unless they are gay then the ‘sex’ is the same), and how well they can speak.  Or, how much they actually want to communicate.  Some men just grunt. 

Wow, Cosmos are my favorite drinkies…

Fridays are good, and yet they, too, can suck.  Anything can suck.  A good steak can suck if you don’t feel like eating it.  Or, if you just heard on the news that they feed toxic waste to the very cattle that your steak came from.  That could make Fridays really nasty.  This Friday is actually pretty nice.  I talked to a friend for a while, drank a few Comsosos, (really goooood oneS!), and here I am with no problems other than the ones I will remember tomorrow.  Tomorrow.  What a nice word.

Gee.  Comososos are the best.